All posts tagged chipotle

The New Years Resolution Will Not Be Televised! (but it will be blogged)

Saw Food, Inc. Kill me now.

food-inc-movie

My New Years resolution (besides working this fat ass out) is to shop at more farmers markets and eat smaller portions with the goal of being a bit more conscious of my consumption. Ima also do my best to plan out meals so I can double up on the ingredients I buy. How many times does your recipe call for scallions, you buy the bunch, use half, and throw the rest out a week later? So yeah, that shit cannot be happening.

Here is mine and B’s meal plan this week, all different meals that use many of the same ingredes:

Bright and Spicy Citrus Salad Over Rice

That Soba Noodle / Shiitake / Spinach jam on the NYTimes most emailed list for the past couple days.

B and I used to wok up some rice on the daily, haven’t in a while, looking to get back to our roots with some Pork Fried Rice. (wok, peanut oil, chopped pork chop, cooked rice (brown?), cabbage, carrot, siracha, sesame oil, cilantro, basil, bam.)

Although I get my Ashe on, on the reg, I also got a need for the chipotle to hit that tongue as well. I’ll be doing this poached shredded chicken breast with chipotle dressing this week as well.

Oh, and something with a sweet potato. All yall healthy people been squawkin about this shit for a while, I really wasn’t down, but I’m going to try it for lunch. I’ll let ya know how it goes.

Guest Post: Pullin’ Pork for America!

Howdy. I’m K. Longtime pal, and co-hanger outer of J & B. J has been asking me for ages to write a guest post. In fact, she’s been kind of a P in the A about it. But hey, my laziness is no match for her persistent nagging. So, buckle your seatbelts, because guess what,…Today Is The Day.

The short of the short is this. A few years back, I read, and instantly forgot, a recipe for shredded pork tacos. Sometime later, remembering only two elements about it 1) the meat was pork shoulder 2) it included apricot preserves, I decided to make the rest up.

Not only did I not embarrass myself, but it was even considered a hit. I’ve done it many more times since, tweaking and adjusting each time.

Fast forward to last Saturday’s 4th of July BBQ. The apricot preserves sat out this time (thank god. –ed.), and I instead brought in a ringer to take this game to the next level. Chipotle Peppers.

*Ahem* Can you say Home Run?? Try sounding it out. “Home” has a long Ō, and the E is silent.

The chipotle is one of my favorite things. It’s a smoked jalapeno. That’s right, some freaking guy (Or girl ya douche bag – ed.) got drunk and amazingly found a way to Improve on the jalapeno.

And well, then I got drunk and used the chipotles to improve on my pork shoulder. Rock and Roll, it most certainly did. The BBQ crowd gave it an A+++.

So, that’s the story, and here’s how you do it. Oh, and did I mention it’s crazy easy? Because it is. It’s CRAZY easy. I mean, on the real. This is the crazy easiest delicious dish you’ll ever make.

Pulled Pork Taco
What’s in it:
1 (7-8 lb) pork shoulder – WITH THE BONE IN IT
1 big yellow onion
4-5 cloves of garlic
2-3 medium jalapeños
1 small bunch of cilantro
2 cans of chipotles in adobo sauce
1 lime
salt/pepper
Serves 15 fat asses

What’s done with it:
Express yourself with a knife on the onion, garlic, jalapenos and cilantro. You can roughly chop the chipotles too if you want, or you can add them whole. Up to you. Or as Marco Pierre White would say, “You’re choice”.

Put the pork in the middle of a big double layer of foil. (needs to be Big cuz you’re gonna wrap it all up in there). Hit both sides with salt and pepper. Cover the whole thing with the chipotles and adobo. Then throw on the stuff you got all choppy with, plus squeezed lime.

Wrap it up in the foil. Make sure it’s as sealed as you can get it, cuz all those mind blowing juices are gonna do their best to escape.

As an added juice-saving precaution, and to minimize any mess, put the package in a baking dish, throw it in a 450 oven, and leave it for 5 hours. Yes. 5 HOURS. Don’t even ask it a question for anything less than 4 ½ hrs.

When done, take it out and let it rest for another 15 minutes. Then pretend its Christmas, and open this very special present to yourself. Trust me, your jaw will drop. Use forks to pull the pork apart. The meat will totally just fall off the bone.

That’s it. Throw it in a tortilla, squeeze a little more lime on it, add some homemade salsa, and you’re laughing.

Thanks K!! For pics of other mind blowing food from the July 4th BBQ, check these delights.


Chicky Chicky

In a short-lived attempt to eat less red meat, I been cookin the hell out of some chicken. Chicken is fun to cook with cause you can make it be anything you want. Blank freakin canvas, I always say. So, I thought I would get creative and make up a good ol sarnie. Check yourself before you wreck yourself.

Grilled Chicken Sandwich with Pickled Carrots, Watercress and Chipotle Yogurt

thin chicken breasts
juice of 1 lemon
carrots, shredded
the brine of your favorite spicy pickle
watercress
1 10oz plain yogurt (get the kind with active cultures cause they’re good for the vagina)
1 tbs chipotle seasoning
1 tsp cayenne pepper
delish bread of your choosing
salt and pepper to taste
oil for your grill

This serves 2.

Salt, pepper, and squirt lemon juice your chicken cutlets. Toss em on a stovetop grill. Now. This is very important, so listen up. If you want those cool ass grill marks on your meat like you see in the movies, drop your meat on the grill and let it chill for a few minutes. Don’t be all up in its face and moving it around and such or you’ll never sear those precious stripes. Leave it alone.

Anywho. If your chicken was pounded thin or cut thin, it will grill for about 4 minutes on each side, so you better get to workin.

Shred your carrots with the widest shredder you got. Grab your favorite pickles from the fridge. Mines For. Sure. are McClures Spicy Pickles. Hoe Man. Go Get urselves some now.

Anywho. Grab your favorite pickles from the fridges and pour some of the brine over your carrots. Ideally, you would have done this the day before. But, if you’re like me, you didn’t, and the carrots are more mild than you’d like. Set aside.

Grab your yogurt. Throw in the chipotle and cayenne. Mix well. Set aside.

Wash the watercress and dry well.

Cut your bread, throw on a healthy amount of watercress, add the chicken, then the carrots, then the yogurt. Eat and complain that the yogurt was only ALRIGHT. On the real, I would maybe try a different sauce for this. Got any good ideas? Maybe cayenne and paprika? Maybe substitute the yogurt with mayo and use less? Dunno, but don’t lie… that sammich looks real nice.